The assignment for Day 1 of the 30 Days of Truth challenge is to write about something I hate about myself. If you've read this blog anytime within the last year then you are probably aware of the personality flaw that I'm consumed with at the moment (Heck, I'm in therapy for it for goodness sakes.) But I think I'll go with something different, a topic I haven't verbally beaten to death quite yet -- my perfectionism.
I once took a sewing class in college where I always managed to be the last person to complete my projects. The professor announced to everyone in class that there's always one person who is so painstakingly particular in the way they put together a garment that they lag behind the rest of the pupils. She said that I was that person in her class.
I managed to get past my collegiate sewing course but my high standards and my consistent inability to measure up to those standards has plagued me my whole life and has been the source of great unhappiness in a lot of different ways -- my career (I should have been a well-paid computer programmer instead of a "lowly" administrative assistant) , my appearance (I've never been at peace with not being thin), my hobbies (I don't spend enough time perfecting my god-given talents -- like writing and baking).
Funny thing is though, one of the things that I hate most about myself and that brings such dissatisfaction is also one of my best qualities.
I'll talk about that tomorrow.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
2 comments:
Maybe if you learned to accept the fact that perfect is not always the best thing or a desired goal, it would be easier on you. Being above the norm, above average, is a good enough goal. I know you want to be perfect like me, but forgetaboutit, yo.
Sounds like this quality has also led you to do some good things, though. Some way you will find a way to maintain your high expectations for yourself with a healthy dose of self-forgiveness!
Post a Comment