Learning to share a bed

Did I mention that The Boyfriend visited this past weekend? Right now, as I type this, he is on a plane back to Chicago. He was supposed to leave Sunday night, but for some reason, his flight kept getting delayed. His plane finally took to the air around 7:30pm.

While he was here, I got a glimpse into what life will be like sharing a bed with someone else. The Boyfriend and I have have shared a bed before, and it's always been an adjustment for us. We are both only children who are not used to sleeping in such close quarters. For me, sharing a bed on this visit was particularly difficult. I have become more aware than ever of that imaginary line in the middle of the bed that shall not be crossed. The left side of that line belongs to me. I own that piece of real estate, and I'm the only one that's supposed to be living there. Now, The Boyfriend is certainly welcome to come visit during cuddle time or other moments of physical intimacy. Outside of that, the property laws clearly state that he is to stay on his side of the bed or be subject to certain penalties that may include but are not limited to an elbow to the back of the head.

Another thing that I noticed on The Boyfriend's visit is his uncanny ability to steal exactly 1.276 inches of cover from me every time he turns over. By the middle of the night, I am coverless and shivering. I finally resorted to grabbing hold of the comforter whenever The Boyfriend changed positions just so I could hang on to my meager share of bedding.

All that being said, as I am sitting here listening to the quietness of this house, I am finding myself missing him. I would gladly put up with The Boyfriend's bed hogging, sheet-stealing ways if it meant I could be with him all the time.

******

A Lovebird Challenge 2 Update:

Grizzbabe - 900
The Boyfriend - 690

But it ain't over yet. Kansas managed to slither their way into The Final Four, and if they end up winning it all, I'm screwed. So to speak.

The Boyfriend & Grizzbabe Lovebird Challenge 2

For the second year in a row, The Boyfriend and I are engaging in a little March Madness competition. For the second year in a row, I am going to try and beat him. So far, so good. As of right now, the standings are:

Grizzbabe - 360 points

The Boyfriend - 270 points

But there is still a LOT more basketball to be played, and he could make that deficit up easily as the tournament progresses.

When I won last year, The Boyfriend had to pay up by fixing me breakfast. Considering that he had never cracked an egg before he met me, this wasn't an easy task. But he came through with flying colors. This year's bet is a bit more personal and, dare I say, risque, so I won't reveal the details here. Suffice it to say, I want to win reeaaal bad.

Love and Marriage

The general consensus in the comment section of a recent post concerning the uncertainty of my job situation is that now seems like the perfect time to pack up and move to Chicago to be closer to The Boyfriend. I can't blame anyone for thinking that way. It's a logical thought process. The Boyfriend and I love each other very much, and neither of us can imagine spending the rest of our lives with anyone else, so it should be a no brainer that I relocate to the Windy City, right? Well, things are not quite that simple for a number of reasons.

First off, I own the house that I live in, and the fine print in my mortgage agreement specifically states that I am the only person allowed to occupy my home. That means I cannot rent out my house to anyone else lest I be considered in default, or in something else equally undesirable and damaging to my credit rating. In order to move to Chicago, I would have to sell my house, and in case you haven't noticed, now is not exactly a good time for the housing market.

Complicating matters even further is my financial situation and my family.

Chicago is a very expensive place to live, not as expensive as New York or California, but the cost of living is significantly higher than where I live now. The only way I could afford to move to Chicago is if The Boyfriend and I live together. This would seem like the perfect solution except for one thing: my family is very religious. I would not have their blessing if The Boyfriend and I cohabitated without the benefit of marriage, and their blessing is very important to me. Because The Boyfriend has never prayed "the sinner's prayer", I do not get a lot of emotional support from my fundamentalist friends when it comes to my relationship. It hasn't been easy, but I am learning to deal with the disapproval of my peers. I am not yet ready to handle the disapproval of my family.

The Boyfriend is well aware that the only way to get me to move to Chicago is to make an honest woman of me. But are we ready for marriage? That has been the question The Boyfriend and I have been tossing around for the past few weeks. When my beloved made the suggestion that I look for a new job in Chicago, I asked him point blank if he was ready to get married. After hemming and hawing for a few seconds, he let out a very unconvincing, "I think so." To my surprise, this did not bother me. I understood what he was feeling. I am not ready for marriage either. Don't get me wrong. There is no doubt in my mind that I want The Boyfriend and I to grow old together; I just don't know if now is the right time to get hitched. I feel as if the stars have not aligned in our favor yet. Not a concrete explanation, I know, but that's the best way I can express the hesitance I feel. The Boyfriend feels a hesitance too, and wonders how we will know when the time is right. I have no idea how we will know, but I do believe that, someday, we'll recognize when it's our turn to walk down the aisle.

Ain't I a Woman?

I have recently started attending a new church that has a mostly white membership. Now, I am no stranger to worshiping with my fairer skinned brothers and sisters - I've been doing it since I was 13 years old - but I have to tell you that in all of my years, no decades, of church attendance that this is the first predominately white church I have gone to that actually made an attempt to recognize Black History Month. For the entire month of February(and one Sunday in March), two pages of the bulletin were devoted to an important figure in black history. This Sunday's bulletin focused on Sojourner Truth, an abolitionist and women's rights activist. In 1851, Truth spoke at the Ohio Women's Rights Convention in Akron, Ohio, where she delivered her famous speech "Ain't I a Woman?". I'm sure we all read this back in high school, but the speech is so moving that I thought it deserved a second look.



"Well, children, where there is so much racket there must be something out of kilter. I think'twixt the Negroes of the South and the women at the North, all talking about rights, the white men will be in a fix pretty soon. But what's all this here talking about?

That man over there says that women need to be helped into carriages, and lifted over ditches, and to have the best place everywhere. Nobody ever helps me into carriages, or over mud-puddles, or gives me any best place? And ain't I a woman? Look at me! Look at my arm! I have ploughed and planted, and gathered into barns, and no man could head me! And ain't I a woman? I could work as much and eat as much as a man - when I could get it - and bear the lash as well! And ain't I a woman? I have borne thirteen children, and seen most all sold off to slavery, and when I cried out with my mother's grief, none but Jesus heard me! And ain't I a woman?

Then they talk about this thing in the head; what this they call it? (member of the audience whispers "intellect") That's it, honey. What's that got to do with women's rights or Negroes' rights? If my cup won't hold but a pint, and yours hold a quart, wouldn't you be mean not to let me have my little half measure full?

Then that little man in black there, he says women can't have as much rights as men, 'cause Christ wasn't a woman! Where did your Christ come from? From God and a woman! Man had nothing to do with Him.

If the first woman God ever made was strong enough to turn the world upside down all alone, these women together ought to be able to turn it back, and get it right side up again! And now they is asking to do it. The men better let them.

Obliged to you for hearing me, and now old Sojourner ain't got nothing more to say."