Twenty Questions, Part I or Ten Questions with 10 More to Follow

Below is one of the final exercises for my writing class. The purpose of the exercise is to get to know yourself. My teacher believes that you must know yourself in order to write characters to which your readers can identify.

A lot of times, when people write, they have a tendency to gloss over the bad parts. We were encouraged to be honest when answering the questions and to write the good and bad about ourselves.

The lesson was not intended to be viewed by others, -- we were instructed to answer the questions and then destroy them -- but I want to learn to feel more comfortable with revealing my whole self and not just the cleaned up version of me, so I am posting my answers here.

1.) How would you describe yourself in three sentences?

Believe it or not, I am not much of a talker. I only speak when I have something to say. Also, I am a hopelessly good person who always tries to do the right thing.

2.) What have you done that you are proud of?

Wow. I'm having such a hard time answering this question. I don't know if it's because I feel I haven't done anything noteworthy, or if I feel uncomfortable tooting my own horn. It would be lame to bypass this question without offering at least one thing I've done that makes me want to puff out my chest, so I'll go with this: I was really proud the first time I had one of my posts showcased on indiebloggers.org, but that event was tainted when I emailed the link to all of my friends and only one of them (a freelance writer) wrote back to congratulate me. I was disappointed by the lack of response I received from those who care about me the most, but I was still proud of my achievement.

3.) Do you have any bad habits?

I am a notorious nighttime snacker and have the waistline to prove it. It's a habit I have a hard time breaking. Everyday I make the declaration that this will be the day that I stop snacking, and I'll do fine for a few days, maybe even a week, but sooner or later, I'm back to my old ways. Will someone please volunteer to come to my house at 7 pm every night and duck tape my hands and mouth? I think that's my only hope at this point.

By the way, this was the cleaned up version of my bad habits. I said I wanted to learn to reveal my whole self; I didn't say that I was going to be 100% successful at it. Besides, no one really wants to know that I sniff toe jam on occasion.

4.) How do you feel about the way you look?

Every once in a while, I'll look in the mirror and like what I see, in spite of my imperfections, and I'll feel amazingly beautiful. Most of the time, I feel uncomfortable with the reflection staring back at me. I spend a lot of emotional energy trying to recapture that confident feeling, and it always seems to allude me.

5.) What kind of work do you do?

Incredibly unchallenging, uninspiring, life-sucking administrative work.

6.) How do you feel about your parents?

I love my mom dearly. She is my rock. Whenever things start feeling shaky, I lean on her, and she steadies me. My mom and biological father divorced when I was a baby. He went back to his native country and we haven't seen or heard from him since. I'm a bit unhappy with him for that, but not so unhappy that I wouldn't pursue reconciliation. My stepfather is no longer in my life, and I'd like to keep it that way.

7.) How do you feel about your siblings?

I am an only child so I don't have any siblings. My mom was pregnant once when I was in elementary school. I was happy and all but I wouldn't allow myself to get carried away with excitement. Deep down inside, I knew that I was not destined to be a big sister. A few weeks later, my mom miscarried.

8.) What's your attitude toward money?

I am horrible with money. HOR-RI-BLE. I set another goal this year to save a certain amount of money and have failed miserably. Again. Eating out, another one of my bad habits, was my downfall. My attitude toward money is I wish someone would save me from myself and manage it for me.

9.) Tell me about your childhood in one paragraph?

My childhood wasn't great -- there was a lot of dysfunction and sadness -- but it wasn't completely horrible. There are people out there with much more tragic childhoods than mine. I have quite a few happy memories, most of them involving my mom and grandmother, but some of them involve my stepfather and his side of the family. I spent most of my childhood alone, but I wouldn't necessarily call it lonely. I had one close friend in my early youth, but by the time we reached junior high school, we had drifted apart. I never had any friends that I hung out with after that until I reached young adulthood. Being alone is an environment that I learned to adapt to and enjoy.

10.) What's your philosophy of life?

What?!? You mean I have to pick just one philosophy that I have to live by and apply to every area of my life regardless of whether it's appropriate or not? Well, if you are going to put a gun to my head, I guess my philosophy would be this -- "So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets." Matthew 7:12. I truly believe that this world would be a better place if we all treated each other with more compassion.

To be continued...